


Who The Fuck Catches A Cold In July?

by professionalmomfriend (mothmanwashere)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Humanstuck, M/M, Sick Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-30
Updated: 2015-07-30
Packaged: 2018-04-12 03:39:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4464056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mothmanwashere/pseuds/professionalmomfriend
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave is sick.  Karkat coddles him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who The Fuck Catches A Cold In July?

**Author's Note:**

> Dave is me today, except I do not have a datemate like Karkat to take care of me. Which is why I wrote this alone in my room, wrapped in a cape. Enjoy.

Your name is Karkat Vantas and it's been radio silence from your boyfriend all morning long. 

In the seven months you've been dating, you and Dave have fallen into a sort of routine. You get up by 8 every morning and make yourself breakfast. Dave isn't up that early -- usually not until closer to 9, but he usually sends you a good morning text as soon as he wakes up (usually you're in the shower). Then twice a week, the two of you will exchange a handful or so of texts before you leave for the gym at a quarter after. He meets you there. The two of you go back to yours and shower and make lunch, before you leave for work at noon and Dave goes home to hunker down on writing. The other three days you go straight to work and Dave brings you lunch around 2 o'clock. The weekends you spend together, usually at Dave's. 

This morning, though, there is no text when you get out of the shower. You text him while you're still in your towel, asking if he's awake yet. It's about ten minutes before you get a reply, and you sit down on the edge of your bed in just your boxers to read it. 

Dave: yeah im awake but i feel like complete horseshit 

Dave: dont think im gonna make the gym today sorry babe 

Karkat: ARE YOU OKAY? 

Karkat: SHIT MY CAPS LOCK IS STUCK AGAIN. 

Dave: dude just buy a new phone 

Dave: anyway its just a cold but im really fucking miserable 

Karkat: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU CATCH A COLD AT THE END OF JULY? 

Dave: idk 

You twist your mouth and decide to go over and make sure he's comfortable and staying hydrated. You don a pair of jeans and a t-shirt that reads "Talk Shakespearean to Me" and pocket your phone, car keys, and wallet. Your roommate glances up at you as you head out of your bedroom. "Mornin' KK." Sollux quickly returns his attention to his Honey Nut Cheerios and the laptop balanced precariously atop two bony knees. 

"Morning," you return, pulling a Nutri-grain bar out of the pantry. "Where are your fucking pants?" 

Sollux shrugs and you roll your eyes. The two of you have lived together long enough for it to be pretty old hat when the other is less than dressed, but you know that if left to his own devices, Sollux would forget to eat, sleep, and bathe. He does that pretty regularly, anyway. When did you become the fucking mom to all your friends? God, you're gonna need to get some pointers from Kanaya. 

"I'm going to Dave's. He's sick, so I'm checking up on him." 

"You're gonna get sick, KK." 

"I'm not gonna get sick," you scoff. "Vantases have the immune systems of fucking elephants." 

"I'm sure that's what DV was thinking right before he came down with a cold in the middle of summer," Sollux retorts. "I could care less, honestly, but just know that I'm not as nice a roommate as you are a boyfriend, so if you're sick, I'm going to laugh my ass off." 

At Dave's apartment complex, you punch in the code for the security door without hesitation and head upstairs. Dave's apartment is on the fifth floor, and when you reach it you don't bother knocking -- just use the spare key he put on your keyring without a word of what it was for or that he wanted you to have it. You figured it out pretty quickly, but haven't had cause to use it. Until now, anyway. 

You make enough noise to alert Dave to your presence, shedding your shoes and your keys on the kitchen counter. He doesn't make an appearance. You head for his bedroom. 

The door is cracked open. You can see a mess of matted blond hair peeking out from under a pile of blankets. You hear a sniffle. "Who's there. I have a sword. Don't fucking test me." 

"Oh my god, you fucking donut, it's just me." 

Another sniffle. Dave's face appears from under the blankets, looking paler than usual and slightly pinched. His eyes are watery and squinting. "Karkat?" 

"Who the fuck else, asshat?" you say, but it's void of any irritation. He looks so small and miserable, and you pity him. "How're you doin'?" 

"Not bad," he croaks, wincing at the effort. "In fact, I was just about to get up and go to my riverdancing lesson." 

"You don't take river dancing lessons." 

"Well, even if I did, the tiny jackhammers pounding into my brain matter say I can't." 

"Have you taken anything for your migraine?" 

Dave shakes his head weakly against the pillows. "I got up and showered, but my head and my throat were killing me, so I just went back to bed. I found some cough drops in the drawer over here." 

"Well those'll help your throat," you say. "And you should be drinking water." 

"Good advice, I'll get right on that," Dave says, throwing the covers back over his head. 

Yup. You're definitely the mom here. 

You leave Dave under the blankets and go to the kitchen for a glass of water. You make sure the tap is cool before filling the glass, and then make a pitstop at the medicine cabinet in the bathroom before returning to Dave's bedside. You go around to the side of the bed he's lying on and set the water and the medicine down before gently rousing him. "Come on, Dave, I brought you some Excedrin. It'll help your head." 

Dave moans pitifully and removes the blankets from his head. He pushes himself up against the headboard and blinks at you tiredly. You hand him the dosage and the glass of water and he swallows both, sipping down almost half the water before setting back on the table. He slumps down and you carefully wedge yourself onto the sliver of bed between Dave and the sidetable, wrapping an arm around him. He curls into you, his head on your chest, and sighs. "Thank you, Karkat." 

"You're welcome, you big baby." You kiss the soft hair on the crown of his head. "Is your stomach upset?" 

He shakes his head. "Nah. It's just my head and my sore throat. Must be a head cold." 

You massage little circles into his back for several minutes and he slowly relaxes into you. Dave eventually drops off to sleep, and once making sure he's soundly unconscious, you carefully extricate yourself from beneath him, tuck him under the covers, and go back out to the kitchen. 

You pull out your phone and call your boss, telling her you won't be into work today. She tells you not to worry, to take a long weekend, and she'll see you on Monday. Perks of working for your aunt. You look around Dave's kitchen for something to feed him that will help his throat. You settle on soup and tea, neither of which he has, so you duck out of the apartment and run down to the corner store. You're gone barely twenty minutes, but by the time you return Dave has woken up and made an appearance in the kitchen, standing in front of his fridge wrapped in the comforter from his bed. He looks at you in surprise. "Thought you left." 

"I did. But I'm back," you say, setting your plastic shopping bag on the table. "I bought soup and tea." 

"Ohhhh my god, that sounds orgasmic," he says, his voice still scratchy and hoarse. He sounds considerably more upbeat, though, which you take to mean that the Excedrin has kicked in. You shake your head at him and send him to go sit down. You boil the water and heat up the soup in the microwave. For the tea, you toss a spoon full of honey and a tea bag into a mug, pour the hot water over, and go to find Dave, balancing both hot receptacles carefully. He's back in his bed, having made a nest out of blankets and pillows, and settled down in the middle with his laptop. He's tapping away at keys as you approach with the tea, and he smiles at you as he accepts it. "Thanks babe." He blows on it and sips a little before setting it aside to let it cool off. You perch on the edge of his bed, watching him for a few minutes, until he looks over at you and says "get the fuck over here, sweetcheeks" and you laugh a little as he shifts in his nest to make room for you. As you settle in beside him, letting him curl up around you and use you as both a pillow and a laptop table, he adds "Of course, if you don't want to get sick, I understand." 

"This is fine, Dave. I have the immune system of--" 

"An elephant, yeah, you've said that." Dave rubs his stubbly cheek against your arm. "Must be better than mine anyway." He types awkwardly with his dominant hand -- left -- and finishes the email he's writing before switching over to tumblr. You hold down the alt button on his behalf as he scrolls through. He's very proud of his blog. 

As the two of you browse, he slowly eats his soup and drinks all of his tea. At one point, you go brew him a second cup and one for yourself. The two of you pass a couple of hours in this fashion before abandoning tumblr in favor of a movie. You move out to the couch for a change in scenery and Dave selects Ferris Bueller's Day Off because "it's a sick day movie". You don't argue, because it's one of the few films Dave genuinely likes and doesn't talk shit about. Plus it's a fucking great movie like seriously, you will fight anyone who tries to say that isn't the best movie of all time. 

After the movie, which you and Dave recite at each other in real time, you fix some pasta and the two of you eat it on the couch like the lazy fuckers you are as you queue up the first anime in Dave's list. The only anime, actually. "Fuck yeah, Ouran," Dave mumbles, mouth full of pasta. You're nearly finished with the first episode when you've finished eating, and simply pile your dishes on the coffee table and let Dave curl into you again, his head in your lap, to finish the episode. "Have I thanked you for coming and taking care of me today, yet?" 

You stifle a smile. "You can always do it again." 

Dave grins lazily up at you, fitting your cheek into the curve of his hand. "Oh yeah, smart guy?" He wraps his other hand around your neck and pulls you down so he can press his lips to yours. "Well thank you." 

"I think you could do better than that," you say casually. 

"Don't wanna get you sick," Dave mumbles, half rolling over so that he can sit up and tuck his feet up under him. 

You just look at him with a raised brow. "Dave." 

Dave's mouth twitches into a smile and he shifts again so that he can reach you more easily. He kisses you again and you can taste the peppermint tea on his breath. "Better," you hum between kisses. 

"When you wake up sick tomorrow, I'm going to laugh my ass off," Dave chuckles against your mouth. 

"God, I swear you and Sollux script these things together," you mutter. 

"But it's okay, because then I get to return the favor," Dave says, which pulls a smile onto your own lips. 

"I take it you're feeling better?" 

"Much."

**Author's Note:**

> And Karkat woke up the next day bemoaning his fate with a sore throat.


End file.
